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[topino]

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for shaeir

[topino]

[ from here ]

I think you should try and win. Imagine the rewards you will be blessed with, if you do.

Perhaps if you are my secret lover, inside is a bad idea. Instead, maybe you will have to bed me amongst the orange trees.

for ishq

[topino]

[ from here ]

Yes. The hotel was very nice.

[ As if it was ever the hotel. ]

What is it I'm supposed to wear at dinner to avoid tempting you, then?

for hilts

[topino]

[ from here ]

If you have to stop drinking, other people in your vicinity might have to. I will defend your honour to make sure that doesn't happen.

What if it is just a way to make sure we can continue to do some good? I think I could stand to live that long if it's worth it. We saw Copley's boards, you know we do some right.

[hilts]

How noble of you.

[ there's a long pause before her next text and then: ] Maybe.

The things you see and do to get here might be worth it.
But the people you lose, Nicky, that's never easy.

[topino]

I will get very cranky if I do not get a glass of wine with dinner. We will defend alcohol in our homes.

One day, I know I will lose Joe. I want to know how you manage to keep going, boss, when something like that happens.

[hilts]

Normally I might say I'd die before I let that happen, but that seems a little off colour now.

[ there's another long pause and nicky would be right to wonder if she wasn't going to answer at all. ]

You find something new to keep fighting for. [ another pause, shorter this time ] And you get really fucking drunk for the next 20 to 50 years.

[topino]

It's not as funny now, no.

Maybe I will make a list of all the things he would want me to do. Never show it to him, of course, I think that would cause a fight.

for nickysnotmybf

[topino]

[ from here ]

You tempt me in such delicious and delirious ways, my love.

I could get used to hearing that word. Husband. We are already many times over married, of course, but being your husband is something I cannot do enough times.

[nickysnotmybf]

Being your husband is the greatest treasure this life has been able to give me.

You in a tux is high on that list as well, though. Il mio bellissimo angelo.

[topino]

Do you still have that journal to keep track of all our weddings? I should like to know where we must celebrate the anniversaries,when we can.

I'm happy to delight. If I'm in a tuxedo, I might as well offer you anything else you might want. Any requests?

[nickysnotmybf]

Of course I do, habibi. It's always in the bottom of my bag, just in case we need to add another to the list.

Do you remember the first one?

All I need is you to look at me the way you did then when I first called you 'Husband'. That secret, private ceremony, for just us. The first of many times I tied myself to you for eternity.

[topino]

In that case, let's bring it out again to add a new one. This time, I will wear a tuxedo and you can call me husband in front of a small gathering, maybe in a nice little villa.

I don't remember the details of the first, but I remember you. I remember the name 'husband' from your lips for the first time and thinking to myself that this is what I was meant to be.

[nickysnotmybf]

It was long ago. Illegal and secret. I can't remember as much as I should, but I remember you in such a fine outfit. I remember Andy doing that ancient ceremony for us.

And I remember calling you husband and you calling me the same. And everything was how it was destined to be.

I thought I loved you desperately, then. I don't know how I have room for it all in my body but I swear to you, my love, it grows every day.

[topino]

Most of the best things we did were illegal and secret, Joe, but that's what made them fun. I remember only you. I remember calling you my husband, and I remember how I felt that night.

It grows in me, too. You make a space every morning with a new kiss, I think. And I love you for it. It makes me so proud to be the man you love, and it's why I want to do good and right, because I want to earn all your adoration.

[nickysnotmybf]

There is nothing you need to do in order to have my devotion. You've laid claim to every inch of it from our first moments. There is nothing you could do to be free of it, now.

My husband. Then, now, and forever.

for thattime

[topino]

Am I wearing anything in the water, in this mental vision of yours?

[ Joe's warmth is something he seeks out, leaning into his touch and breathing out a sigh of relief for the way it seems to calm the steady thrumming of his bloodlust. Maybe tonight, he won't research plane tickets back to London to find that doctor again and make her suffer for what she did to Joe.

He smirks at the thought of sketches. ] I don't know. You lost that one sketchbook in Italy a few hundred years ago, someone might find it.

[thattime]

No. What's the point of a private beach if we have to wear clothes?

[ It's not easy to calm Nicky's temper when it's up. Joe knows just how deep and strong that bloodlust goes but he also knows how to soothe him with slow, steady patience and affection. ]

And I'll keep 'losing' them until some art historian has the courage to say 'Al-Kasanyi is clearly in love with his subject and they must have had a very intimate relationship'.

[ He rolls his eyes. All this good friend nonsense. It's Leyendecker all over again. ]

[topino]

So every morning, I will put breakfast beside the beside and strip off my clothes to wade into the sea and greet you, as if Venus?

[ He could do that. If it's a private beach, of course. Curling into Joe's touch, he lets his breathing steady him, slow exhalations as he pushes them out. ]

You know, modern photography is something that might get that message across. I think it will be harder to misinterpret, especially if you portray us both together.

[thattime]

I would believe you are a sea nymph come to tempt me but I'd much rather wake up with you in my arms.

[ He runs his fingers through Nicky's hair. They'll be home soon enough. ]

I am not against taking some photos of us together but sketching you will always be more intimate.

[topino]

There is no better way to wake up than with my hand tangled in yours, your breath soft on my neck.

[ He still can't believe it took them so long to discover such a perfect sleeping position all those years ago, because once it did happen, it had felt like nothing else mattered. Nicky's eyes flutter shut at the touch to his hair, clenching the bottle of wine tighter. ]

I would never deny you a sketch. I think maybe I could borrow a little silk robe, stand on a pedestal, and be your model. You are my favourite artist to pose for.

[thattime]

Mmm, yes. It's the best sleep I get.

[ There was a lot they had to discover about each other in those early days. Now, he knows almost every facet of his Nicolo. ]

Where are we going to find a house with a private beach and a pedestal? Besides, I'd rather sketch you tangled in bedsheets after I've had my way with you for hours.

[ Clearly, Nicky needs the time away. Joe will talk to Andy alone and make sure it happens. ]

[topino]

[ They don't get enough of it, and they absolutely do not get enough mornings where they wake up on their own, with the sun slowly dawning and the both of them in one another's arms. What Nicky wouldn't give to not be woken up in a sudden panic. ]

I can buy a pedestal, but I think I like your thinking better. Bedsheets and my spent body, with my hair a wreck.

[ He's been growing it out since London with no intention to stop (it'll help with whatever identity comes next), and he does always like the way it looks when Joe has absolutely wrecked him in bed. ]

Here. Take the wine. [ Because he's digging out the keys for their current living quarters, suddenly tense as he wonders if Andy or Nile will be waiting for an explanation of where he went. ]

for shaeir (8/15)

[topino]

If I'm blinding you, then I think I need to also buy you proper sunglasses to not cause permanent damage to your perfect eyes.

Re: for shaeir (8/15)

[shaeir]

You never cause me damage. Your presence is a healing balm to all that ails me.

[topino]

You and your words are, as ever, endlessly romantic. I would love to believe I'm the reason you heal, but even I cannot take that credit.

You are the one who is glorious, you know. And I am the one who should be using that word more.